If someone sat me down, and started to whisper gently in my ear… “Once apon a time, in a land full of strange beings, you will achieve something very magical, precious and special that will make you shine and blossom.” i think i would probably have given them that same look i recall giving when i found out that the tooth fairy really was no more than a figment of the imagination.
Yet, this very last Wednesday evening, i think i heard those words pretty much resonate inside my little head more than once. You may think this is just my usual rambling, but there is a point to it, if you can bear with me while i spit it all out. You might want to grab a coffee and a cushion first though, it’s ok, i will try and type slow so you can catch up after the kettles boiled.
Ok, welcome back, and if you are sitting comfortable, then i shall begin.
About a year ago, i met an amazing man, grew more than fond of him, and slowly let him enter my heart. Perhaps it was intuition, just a gut feeling, or the desire to finally have found someone that could read complicated little me, and understand what i needed before i even knew what that could be! When i look back now, i was introvert, shy, confused, needy, being flirtatious and cheeky only to mask what was deeply hidden inside and had never seen the light of day.
He saw something in me, nurtured it, coaxed it slowly and together even i began to realise that what was happening was really quite a feat of transformation of what i was, to what i currently am, and no doubt there is yet more to be discovered yet.
Who would have imagined, that this quiet, shy woman, would come so far in such a short space of time! I for one, certainly remained clueless, and really it is only recently i have begun to not only understand myself a little more, but the reasons for all the little things that have gotten me to where i am today. Those that have never experienced change, accepted change, and understood why it has had such a dramatic effect on many other things should probably stop reading now and just go get a sandwich or something. Being set challenges, to me have always in the past been a little like being teased or dared, and i would either counter with a defence, or rise to the challenges set just to gauge the reaction sometimes. But for last Wednesday, something just clicked inside me. My task? well it was talked about jokingly for a good few weeks before the day arrived, and i had ample opportunity to dismiss the idea as pre-prosperous or ridicule it – but i chose not to, instead, rising to the challenge with enthusiasm!
I wanted to please and make him proud of me for many reasons, and i truely believe that i did so, but not without the help of not only my closest D/s friends encouragement, but of complete strangers who also encouraged me with genuine comments and no judgements.
So…………….. the task – was to have my breasts painted up in body paint to look like pumpkins! i had come up with the idea after many discussions with him, and we both knew it would be a huge thing for me to be on display to a group of people in this way – i was comfortable with it only really when i had taken that last little leap of being paraded amongst everyone. The comments received boosted me no end, my face must have been quite a picture and i soon forgot that i was actually walking around a venue, with my tits on display, covered very tastefully i have to say in an amazingly fabulous artwork design that really just came from looking at pictures in the internet. it was at the eleventh hour that i actually managed to find a pic that looked remotely possible to replicate on my tits and then there was the added concern… what if a mistake gets made and we have to start over? Hard enough to have two women, both very close friends of mine, to apply the paint, and hard for me to NOT giggle and make my tits wobble.. but between the three of us.. it was achieved… i have them to thank greatly for it and for the encouragement to actually leave the changing area to walk through the party crowd. After the first half hour, my inhibitions and blushing seemed to stop – i felt quite fine, at home, comfortable and thinking that it was really not that hard to have done… i am sure the claw marks of my fingernails on the changing room door are still there – but i was actually more worried about the heels i chose to wear. i rarely wear heels.. now i remember why.. i walk too slow and the floor was slippy.. i was dressed in a black and orange home made tu-tu and lace tights/pantyhose and didnt want to spoil my entrance!
Suffice to say, it has not only encouraged me, it has made me realise it doesnt matter what is on the outside at all – it is what is inside that matters anyways – personality is what shines the most – and on Wednesday night you could have lit up the whole of the City of London with the beaming proudness i wore INSIDE myself!
So, now you have had your coffee.. and i have warmed my cold fingers up, i shall close and say just……..THANK YOU………you know who you are.. so does everyone else, and i love You so very much.. always, Yours, forever.x